The Heart of Letter Writing

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As a busy mom who manages a full household schedule week in and week out, one of the simple pleasures in life is receiving a personalized letter in the mail. Amid all the junk mail, catalogs, and bills that fill our mailbox, an envelope with familiar handwriting is a welcome sight of personal connection.

Of course, in our day and age, we have many modes of communication and connection. However, social media is intended for a broad audience; email inboxes are overloaded as it is; and texts are designed to convey quick, pithy questions and comments. Hand-written letters, on the other hand, allow for a personality to come alive through the self-expression of everything from penmanship to the craftsmanship of words. Unlike our instant communication through the use of technology, one does not need any particular reason to write a hand-written letter, nor even to have an expectation of a response.

fingers, pen, writingCan you remember the last time you took pen to paper and wrote to another person (baby shower thank-you notes excluded)? Why not give it a try? I find it as therapeutic as the trendy adult coloring books, because, similarly, letter writing forces me to focus and slow down.

Picking the Paper

Since letter writing is a tactile experience, the medium for your message is important to consider. Choose stationery that appeals to you – whether it’s a monogrammed notecard or a greeting card that makes you laugh. If you’re crafty, make your own card. You know all that excess artwork your children bring home that you feel guilty recycling? Send one in a letter to your mother-in-law; include one in the next card to your college roommate. Print a photo (do people still do that?!) from your smart phone, or dig through your photo archives and enclose a favorite picture in a card. Choose a pen or a marker, or whichever writing instrument sparks creativity and fun.

Assessing the Audience

The options are endless as to whom to choose to write. What about that friend that you have meant to call, but you can’t seem to find sufficient time for a conversation now that you have kids? What about that family member to whom you used to be more connected, but time and distance separate you from one another? Remember that mom you know who is struggling and you’ve wanted to find a way to offer encouragement? Remember when you used to write your significant other little love notes? What about that thank you note that you keep putting off, hoping it will write itself? Have you ever written a letter to your child, either a lunchbox note, if he or she can read, or a letter addressed to them in the future? Pick a kid you know who’s in college — your nephew, a former babysitter — and drop him or her a line (remember how great it was to receive mail in college?). Find an organization in which you can write to soldiers, or prisoners apart from their families. Write an elderly person (your great aunt, your former neighbor) whom you know would love a letter. Write a letter to your parents, your in-laws, or your childhood friend.

Consider the Content

As far as what to write, don’t make the process more difficult than it needs to be. As a mom, you probably have a limited time to craft a letter (unless you give up some of your social media time!) so it’s okay if it’s brief. Be supportive to those in a difficult place in life. Recall a shared story with someone with whom you share history and memories. Tell something silly or new that your kids said or did. Offer gratitude to people who have touched your life. Write something funny. Be heartfelt. Be you.

In motherhood, especially early motherhood, it’s easy to lose our connection with others outside of our home and also lose our sense of personal identity. Letter-writing allows for both — and, who knows, perhaps receiving your letter may give the person you send it to a connection that he or she also has longed for.

To whom will you write your next letter?

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Robyn
Robyn met her husband in his homestate of North Carolina, and, as he says, they “comprised” after marriage and settled one hour from her family and six states from his. Still, they love to visit friends and family in North Carolina every year with their 10-year-old daughter and 8-year-old son. They have gladly called Fort Worth home for more than a decade where Robyn works as a pastor at a Presbyterian church, particularly focused on mission outreach and family ministry. Reading “grown up” books, having travel adventures, and enjoying thoughtful conversations are what keep her going.

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