It’s My Crib, and I’ll Cry if I Want to

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Before we brought home baby, I had zero idea so many philosophies existed about a baby’s sleep–and the shelves of consequent books.

We found out our darling girl was ours on a Monday morning, and brought home our two-week-old beauty the next afternoon. While my preparation time was shorter than most (by about nine months, ha!), I discovered the realities of parenting, especially for us first timers, is the same. Whether you welcome a wee one to your family through adoption or birth, one minute you are not holding a baby in your arms. The next minute you are.

And suddenly decisions about sleep become paramount.

For the first few weeks of our baby’s life, we quickly soothed any cries whether in the night or day to strengthen the bonding process with her. Yet, even in this, I started to think about parenting her in the area of sleep. We never turned on an overhead light in her room during night hours. We never blacked out her room during the day. All in hopes to set up patterns of day and night and routine.

As our little one began sleeping for longer stretches (around 6-8 hours per night) somewhere around 3-4 months, we began putting her to bed awake-ish in efforts to transition her from going to sleep in our arms in the rocker to being able to self soothe. Our evening routine consisted of bath, lotion, pjs, bottle, rocking/singing–all in the same room, the same way every night. When she began to show cues of drowsiness (usually in less than a few minutes), I’d place her in the crib.

ANNA ZANE 036At the 4-6 month mark, we started allowing her to fuss in bed for a few minutes, that is, if she didn’t go to sleep after being placed in the crib. We let her cry for timed intervals (10 minutes at most). The majority of the time, she only fussed for a handful of minutes. At the 10 minute mark, one of us would go in the nursery, re-insert the pacifier (because Lord knows she somehow chunked it across the crib), and pat her back for just a bit (two or three minutes tops). If she cried again after me leaving her room, I’d again give her a few minutes to settle. If she didn’t, I go in and rock her again, starting that routine all over.

When she would wake up in the middle of the night–that is, if it wasn’t a regular feeding time or after she was sleeping through the night–we’d give her the 10 minute limit again. Most times, she went back to sleep on her own.

anna zane 102In all honesty, our little one only “cried it out” a handful of times, absolutely less than 10. I believe learning to self soothe early on combined with the structure, safety, and predictablility of a sleep routine helped our cutie sleep better and enjoy her crib. She often played in her crib at night and in the mornings. In fact, she still plays in her bed most mornings before she comes downstairs. (She will get VERY upset if you enter her room before she’s ready. Hilarious really.)

While I know every child is different, including their sleep cues and needs, having a game plan and routine helped us all survive the sleepless months, getting us on track to better, longer stretches of sleep.

How did you parent your wee one in regards to sleep during those first few months of infancy?

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