Passionate About Fort Worth
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Breastfeeding Is Not My Love Language

If you asked some of my closet friends what my love language is they would say giving gifts. I love getting my friends and family the perfect gift or finding the perfect party favor for an event. I love it so much that I have a tendency to go overboard. My husband rolls his eyes at me is totally supportive. And what would be my least favorite way to show and receive love? Physical touch. I have never been a touchy, feely type of person, and therefore, have perfected the side hug. For this reason (and a few more), I never enjoyed breastfeeding.

breastfeeding

breastfeeding

Nursing actually came very easy for us. We had zero latch issues, zero supply issues, no mastitis, no clogged ducts. So why in the world did I dislike it so much?

I am a pretty private person so nursing in public was just NOT an option for me. Could.not.do.it. Therefore, I was confined to private places for round the clock nursing sessions. I totally understand this was my own insecurity. I admire those of you who can nurse under any and all circumstances. That just wasn’t for me.

My son would NOT take a bottle. Being a first-time mom, I was dead set on following all the rules. So no bottle or pacifier for my kiddo until he was three weeks old. When we reached that milestone, he was given a bottle, which he took with no problem. I was still nursing, so he wouldn’t need bottles, right WRONG!! I totally dropped the ball in thinking that if he took a bottle once he would take it again. Despite maximum efforts by myself and my husband, dreams of taking a bottle were dashed.

I never felt that sweet bond while nursing, partly because I am not a physical touch kind of person and partly because I just didn’t enjoy it. Is that strange? I know that I love my son with all my heart despite the fact that I never enjoyed nursing him. I also know the majority of moms who breastfeed do have those wonderful bonding feelings and even go on to nurse for a long time. More power to you, momma! I just never felt it and neither did my son (I think).  By the time he was seven months old, the last thing he wanted to do was lay in my arms and eat. He was far too busy for that, and feeding time became such a battle.

The best thing about breastfeeding for me was the day we stopped. I remember it so vividly because it was 100 percent planned. Leading up to the day, I researched sippy cups and formula like you wouldn’t believe. We practiced both until I was confident that my son could tolerate them well. And then . . . DONE! It happened to be my birthday, and my son turned nine months old. Praise God! I will never forget it.

Would I breastfeed again? If I was ever lucky enough to have another child, then yes, I would nurse again. But I would do things much differently. I would throw out the rule book and do what was most comfortable for me. There would be bottle sessions every.single.day! And I would introduce formula early so we would know which one was tolerated well. Sure, “Breast is Best,” but this momma’s sanity is extremely important too.

How was your breastfeeding experience? Love it? Hate it? Would you do it again?

2 Responses to Breastfeeding Is Not My Love Language

  1. Diana
    Diana August 7, 2016 at 5:58 am #

    Such a great post! It’s a comfort to know I’m not the only one! I don’t dislike breastfeeding. I do experience that bonding feeling sometimes. But I’m also not touchy-feely, and I don’t enjoy being tied down for 45-minute sippy sessions (my sweet girl takes her time). Pumping is the absolute worst! I’m so ready to be done! We just fought the batttle ofje bottle and got her to take one. I’ll certainly take your advice and insist on more frequent bottle feedings and an early intro to formula. Great points!

  2. Chalna
    Chalna August 7, 2016 at 9:05 am #

    I love love love this!!!! I think it’s SO important for us mamas to know that everyone is different and there is no “one right way” on this journey!! I’ve been breastfeeding for a long time and while I absolutely ADORED my hours holding my babies in my arms to feed, I got just as much joy when feeding my oldest, who was a bottle baby! For me, the act of breastfeeding didn’t make that moment any more wonderful than it was when giving a bottle. I’ve definitely had moments when I wondered if I was very strange in that feeing, given all you read on the subject of bonding. So thanks for this! ?

    Also, I made the EXACT SAME MISTAKE with my second son with the bottles and kick myself over it TO THIS DAY! After he took a bottle perfectly at the 3 week mark, in the early days I didn’t go anywhere without him and I just hate pumping. I was a stay at home mom by then and was relishing NOT having to pump. When I was finally ready to come out of the newborn haze and get out of the house alone at the 3 month mark, it was too late. I bought every single bottle on the interwebs and tried every technique to no avail. It really affected my son’s ability to bond with his dad as a baby and also kept me at home for every single nap and bedtime because I was the ONLY person with the goods to feed and soothe him. I’m done having babies now, but I share my advice with everyone I can…introduce that bottle!!! A LOT!! Even if you don’t go anywhere!!! LOL!

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