Celebrating Love Without the Valentines

Love is in the air. Stores are full of red and pink hearts and chocolates. Everything reads “I love you” or sings a sappy song. Your Pinterest feed has blown up with fantastic homemade valentine ideas for your kids and at least one heart shaped pancake how-to. Yup, here comes Valentine’s Day.

This heart filled holiday has had quite the evolution. It began as a pagan celebration of fertility in ancient Rome. Christians rebranded it as the feast day of St. Valentine. Hallmark, chocolate companies, and florists saw a business opportunity and capitalized on it, turning it into its modern festivities. I’m pretty sure our celebrations today bear no resemblance to its beginnings. 

My own feelings toward Valentine’s Day have changed as well throughout my life. As a child, I remember my dad leaving chocolates outside of our doors and exchanging valentines with every member of my class in decorated paper bags. Middle school came and a dance was added into the mix — boys on one side and girls on the other. Boyfriends and dates appeared in high school, and added some expectations of cheesy romance: candy, flowers, cards, etc. In college, I was most often separated from my sweetheart on Valentine’s so traditions began to change and tone down. By the time said sweetheart and I were married, we had gone from celebrating with Valentine’s Day staples to treating February 14 like any other day. And there we remain, with the recent addition of sending valentines with our children to share with their classmates.

Valentine’s Day can be simple. It can be a day to celebrate love of all kinds with everyone. Love IS something that should be celebrated in all its forms and expressions. I absolutely believe in love and celebrating the ones I love. I just don’t do it on Valentine’s Day in a Valentine’s way.

The pressure of Valentine’s Day turns me off. I don’t like the concept that the quality or quantity of someone’s love is judged by their actions on this one day. 
 

There are so many things in my life that are a celebration of love. Making pancakes in the evenings when I’m tired so my kids can have them for breakfast before school the next morning. Grabbing an extra bag of popcorn at Target to take home to my husband because it’s one of his favorites. Getting in the car to go get gas before I do whatever errand I need to and finding a full gas tank thanks to said husband. While none of these things come in a pink heart shaped box, they are all tiny celebrations of love in my life and each one warms my heart.

I believe Valentine’s Day can be whatever you make it. It can be a chance to remind someone important that you love. It can be a day like any other where you show love in small ways. It can be a day where you celebrate your love for yourself. It can be anything you want it to be and everything that works for you.

Whether you do it up big, small, or not at all, I hope you spend Valentine’s Day, and every day, loving the people in your life and making sure they know it.